Herbert has his say!

A Word from Herbert

"What Fresh Hell is THIS Then??"

My second blog (November 2020)

I've already introduced myself, so I'm going to save time and not do that this time. To read my last blog please click here.


What a surreal couple of weeks I've had, I don't mind telling you. Firstly, my "brother from another mother", a rather portly red tabby (I have other names for him but have been asked by legal team not to mention them) managed to fall off a fence when trying to navigate Auntie Jane's garden.  He managed to bruise his chest and had a lump appear, what an absolute womble he is!


Needless to say, the bi-peds shut the doors on us and we were put under house arrest for a week.  This is not good for someone as handsome as me who enjoys the delights of ill-gotten chicken.  I protested many times, at all hours of the day and night but alas it seemed to fall on deaf ears.  I was mighty vexed by the whole situation.


Anyway, the postscript to this story is that eventually my protestations were heard by my house staff and they correctly decided to relent and let me once again go out to see my people and the other kitchens I adore.


Then... we had just got used to being our usual free spirits when all these loud noises were coming from outside.  They were sometimes followed by brief blinding lights.  As you should know by now, I'm no "scaredy cat" (chuckle chuckle), but even these caused me a little discomfort.  Then, as with the lumpy chested red-tabby incident, the bi-ped house staff once again closed the portal to the outside world and insisted on playing rock 'n' roll music really loudly.  I was cut deep, I'm more of a jazz fan myself!


Then... the morning after bangy and flashy night, I awoke from my nighttime nap and excitedly strutted downstairs to commence my daytime nap only to find the house staff sitting in my beds.  What was going on here? Sunday Brunch wasn't even on and there they were using phrases like "day pyjamas", "working from home" and "decorating" whilst sat down IN MY BEDS.  This was the final straw to be honest.  I'm completely in tatters now.


Still, the consolation is that the heating is on all day now so I'm toasty warm and I've found a new bed next to the radiator.  So every cloud, eh??


Other Stuff


I have also been asked by my legal team to mention that the physical shop is sadly shut as it is not essential. However, the house staff are still operating a local delivery and mail order option from the website.  They will be doing this on a Monday, Wednesday and Saturday with a cut-off point of 12noon on the day.

Trev is still doing background work on the website to make it a lovely place for you to visit.


Herbert

Pedigree Siamese and the most important and beautiful creature to walk the planet.